and kyle said "sometimes you just gotta wet it first then add a lil' suddz as need be."

too many to count. too many to remember.

home videos at warehouse lobby. me chewing gum, me with toothpaste smeared everywhere, me covered in paint, body blocked by a chunk of beige painted foamcore. Me lying with my grandmother's pig, my grandmother's fire-dragons chewing at my face. I wore red and orange.

I dreamt a butterly came to my window to say that i would die today.

I dreamed of hydroplaningin mud. Mytical lands where you pay in wild flower leaves.Purple lily plants resembled unicorns and got excitd when you pour glitter over their heds.

My next door neughbors, we hung out in a dream. They stole things out of my refrigerator and drank on the fire escape.

ready to go

dreamt of shopping with my sister. mary kate gave me a great pair of shorts. Told someone they looked 'so cute in that' as a joke, but never laughed. Found a hip pair of sandals and realized I had everything I needed to leave. stood outside to hitchhike - held a neon sign that read "hot dude? pick me up."

Why are you trying to get back in my life?

i dreamt of a manhattan apartment too large with ceilings too high. I dreamt my sister lived with me and family friends rang my front door bell to bring house warming gifts.

I dreamt Olive was Max and ran away to a house where feral cats congregate. When the house was invaded she was the only one who ran.
Simultaneously I was stuck in a place with the only woman I've ever hated in a large open field. I said nothing to her.

dreams of ghosts haunting the house of a family friend. falling in love with the son and purging the walls of lost spirits (a baby, a child, an elderly man) -- starting with the baby



dreams of david letting me down. deflated, leaking water balloons. sudden changes of plan. one sided struggles and ultimate abandonment. lost in the train station, frustrated and angry by the likes of you. avoiding him like the plague.


horror house set-ups with close friends. deranged innocents wearing skins of other innocents. exposed guts. backstage/inner workings of this machine.


walking to charleston--chewing gum.

last night i dreamt i worked in a marine biology lab/aquarium deal that specialized in seals. I fell in love with my superior (who was older), who was engaged to a real-sexy-fine canadian woman. He chose me. it was scandalous. It was seal birth-giving time-we were planning on one baby seal, but we got two. The dude i was 'in love' with sold the second one on the black market. I was angry. A family of four (two daughters and a dog) bought it. They ended up wanting to put it down because it wouldn't do tricks, the guy i liked did something heroic and saved its life, so then i was no longer p-oed at him. ...then we did the dirty....yea. I think i was austrailian. He was definitely blonde.

Later in the night i had a second dream on the same topic, only this time it was scandalous because it was illegal...oh young love. A friend of mine in the dream (who was sexually abused i assume) asked me if he made me "smoke his dick." Uhh.....no.

Anyway... i was left pretty hot and bothered for the rest of the day. He was definitely a looker.

Hello/Screaming About Toys

Hello! I am going to make (attempt to make) a blog of my nightly/daily dreams. :-)

I was at my house in Georgia. My mom and Aunty Cathy were upstairs cleaning out the cabinets in the loft, throwing away all of my "childhood things." I was downstairs, looking up to them and kept screaming and screaming at my mom. My chest was tight and I was enraged. I told her that "I hate you when you do these things." Both my Aunt and my mom were, psychically how they looked when they were younger -- This was more apparent in my aunt because she was facing me, while my view of my mom was 3/4 from the back. My mom kept 1) Denying that this was what she was doing and 2) telling me how ridiculous and irrational I was being. My aunt, once I was upstairs and walking towards my sister's room, said something along the lines of "well at least now you know your antidepressants are working," or something like that (i do not take anti-depressants). My reaction was to be mad, but I said to myself "she would say that, she's obsessed with medication," and held my tongue.

I'm standing in the loft looking into the much more sparce cabinets. My mom and aunt are now downstairs. I am rummaging through the far left cabinet asking her if she could atleast ask me before she threw things out -- maybe let me pick what I wanted to keep. She said it's too late. I, in a flabbergasted tone, was all "MY GRANDCHAMPIONS?! MY WAFFLE BLOCKS?" She said, "your grandchampions are in the basement." Knowing full well they were not. I find this hand embroidered (with my initials) laundry bag I got as a gift a while back -- in real life it is blue. This one is pink, the color of another laundry bag I own that is mass produced and says "DIRTY" on the side.